Scholarship and Columbarium

I received good news from the OSU Foundation that Curt's Scholarship is now fully endowed at $25,000. This will generate income for annual scholarships of at least $1,000. If the endowment grows, the scholarship can increase, or possibly generate two scholarships (unlikely). They have awarded the first scholarship to a student who will be a senior next year. According to their information - "He is a College of Engineering Dean's Scholar, and among the best and brightest in the program."
Also, the church is going to use some of Curt's church memorial money to hire a landscape architect to draw up plans for columbarium "garden" at our church. This is going to take awhile. It has to be approved by a couple committees in church, the city planners, and then by the congregation. We won't have the full plans until October. But things are moving.
I am keeping busy, but still miss Curt. I spent last week at Eagle Crest in Central Oregon with Angie's family. I am leaving for Beth's in Schaumburg, IL on Tuesday (July 13). Angie and the girls will join us the following week. Next weekend I will go with Beth, Aaron and Sam to the Wisconsin Dells, where Aaron is playing in a baseball tournament. On July 23 we will all drive to Aurelia, IA for a Stutz Family Reunion. Jef will join us there. I will return to Oregon with the Baker family from Omaha on July 26. I am looking forward to Meryl Simpson coming for a visit from England on September 2-16. On September 24 I am flying to Boston for a one week Trafalgar tour of the Fall Foliage with 2 other couples from church. I will stop at Beth's on the way home and return to Oregon on October 7. While I was at Eagle Crest, I had my living room painted and added crown molding. He also painted the hallway. I bought myself a Wii and the Bakers and Bogners gave me Wii Fit for my birthday (tomorrow). I also bought myself another TV in my bedroom.
I miss having Curt proof read this.

Update

I haven't had a chance to write here lately. There is a lot of paper work to do, and I have started back in my "old routine" (tennis, bridge, Folk Club, church, etc.).
I think I mentioned trying to attach Angie's slide show. I don't think I can upload a Power Point file. There are over 200 pictures in the slide show and I don't want to upload all of them. If you were able to download the video of the service, part of the slide show is in that.
I have Curt's ashes here at home and am waiting to see what happens at our church. That could take awhile.
Angie is coming tomorrow to start going through Curt's personal things. It is hard to look at them. The whole Baker family might return next weekend.
I want to maintain all Curt's work in our yard and have arranged for lawn care. I have some things that still need to be planted though (not included in the maintenance).
I still hope to get personal thanks yous written someday!

Memorial Service

It was wonderful to see all the people who came to celebrate Curt's life at his Memorial Service last Saturday (I think over 300). My house is slowly getting more quiet. Today Beth, Angie and I took Jason, Aaron, Sam and Andrea Simpson to the Portland airport. Andrea was on the same flight to Chicago where she was connecting with her flight to London. The other out-of-town relatives started to leave late Saturday afternoon. Beth and Angie will stay here until Friday. A former neighbor took pictures and video (about 1 hour) of the service. To view this you need to go to http://bit.ly/cfeF8E. I think the file is 1.5 gb. I didn't know he was going to do this, and it was a great surprise. Angie also made a slide show of old pictures that we showed before the service and at the reception/lunch in the Community Center afterwards. I might try to attach that on a later blog.

By the way we had a great time at the beach in Seaside. The weather was good and the house was big, very nice, and close to the ocean. We celebrated Aaron's birthday on March 23 by him feeding sea lions at the Aquarium, riding bumper cars and visiting Ft. Clapsop (Lewis & Clark). The next day we climbed the Astoria Column (164 steps) with spectacular views and exploring the batteries and grounds of Ft. Stevens.

Obituary

I have submitted an obituary for Curt to the Corvallis Gazette Times, Quad City Times, and (Moline) Dispatch. The Dispatch already has it online at www.qconline.com. I'm not sure when it will appear in our paper.

Plans

Everything is set for the service on Saturday, March 27, at 10 AM at the First United Methodist Church in Corvallis. There will be a light lunch afterwards in our Community Center. We hope you can all come.
Curt was cremated today. He has always said that is what he wanted. He even mentioned one time putting some ashes on the pitchers mound. I would like to make a contribution to our church for a Columbarium for his ashes and for other members in the future. This would be different way for you to contribute, besides the Curtis Cook Computer Science scholarship through the Oregon State University Foundation, Benton Hospice, or the Cancer Society.
I am still working on an obituary and keep getting distracted, etc.!
Thank you again for all your support!

Making Plans

We have decided we would like to have Curt's memorial service at 10 AM on Saturday, March 27. This needs to be confirmed by our church (First United Methodist in Corvallis), but our minister indicated that date should be free. We want to have a light lunch afterwards in our church's Community Center. If anyone would like to make contributions, a Curtis Cook scholarship for an OSU Computer Science student has been set up with the OSU Foundation. We would also like to support our church, Benton County Hospice and the Cancer Society.
Before all this happened we had planned to rent a house in Seaside from Monday, March 22, to Thursday, March 25. We have decided this would be good time to spend together as a family. Beth is now here with the Baker family. The rest of her family is going to arrive this Saturday and probably return after the weekend of the 27th.
I don't know how to thank everyone for all the support we have received. It has been a great comfort to me and our family (as well as it was to Curt).

The End

While I have a few minutes in all the hubbub, I want to share that Curt passed away last night. Curt's breathing continued to be heavy yesterday. I called Hospice a couple times and gave him some Lorazepam about 8:30 and midnight last night. I slept on a cot next to sofa and woke up about 1:30 with him flaying around (and partly on my cot) and having difficulty breathing. I called the Hospice nurse on duty (Chrissy), and she came over after 2 AM. She gave him morphine to help with the breathing. This made him flay some more, so she gave him more Lorazepam too. That did not work either, so she gave him some Valium. That seemed to do the job. She was here over 1 1/2 hours and talked about how bad this cancer is. It grows quickly and was impinging on his air supply. She thought the Valium should last about 4 hours and told us to get some sleep. I was going to get a hospital bed and caregiver today and see about sedating him. I did go back to sleep listening to his snoring, but Sue thought it got quiet around 5 AM. Jack and Sue woke me about 7:30 and said they thought Curt had passed away. They called Hospice and Linda was here right away. She removed all Hospice things and made important phone calls. The Huffords and Reistads are here and helping out. We caught Beth before she got on the airplane here. Angie packed and is driving down now. Jef is going to get Beth and bring the girls down later. We have lots of things to take care of now.
Curt was strong until the end. He walked with his walker to bathroom at 9:30 last night. On Tuesday night he played a couple rounds of Mexican Train Dominoes (with lots of help) with Gordon and me. I don't think he was in pain. He did not ask for any pain medicine, but did have the patch. Chrissy said she didn't see any furrows in his brow to indicate pain. He is finally at peace now. We hope to decide on time for a memorial service by this evening. I want to talk to the girls. I am thinking of Friday or Saturday next week (March 26 or 27).

Not Good

Yesterday was a busy day. I was able to get my hair cut and go to the bank while some friends and a hospice volunteer stayed with Curt. I have someone with me at all times now. Kathleen Reistad spent the night last night.
This morning Curt woke up with heavy breathing. When Linda came, she said his breathing is like sleep apnea. She gave him some Lozarepam to relax his breathing and said to stop feeding him. It is a matter of time now. However, Curt has gotten up a couple times for the bathroom. You need to watch him - he has popped right up and tries to walk, with or without the walker. The last trip was difficult to get him back to the sofa, where he will probably be now. The Huffords just arrived and are going to spend the night. Beth is flying in at 1 tomorrow afternoon. Angie might bring her here, or else I will try to find someone to get her. Everyone else is arriving on Saturday for Spring Break week.

Another "Wrinkle"

The Bakers left after supper last night. Curt wanted to go out to our porch and wave goodbye to them.
Linda had some more information for us today. She said Curt's jerking, etc., could be a side effect of the anti-nausea gel I put on his arm 1/2 hour before he eats. I am glad to discontinue that to see what happens. Another cause of the jerking could be that the tumor has reached some nerves in his brain. This could lead to a seizure. I will need to contact them right away. They are having some medicine delivered here today for them to use if this happens. So one more thing to look out for. Linda also said not to feed him if he doesn't want it. So far when I ask him, he says he is hungry.
Tom Plant called this morning to say the OSU Computer Science Department is going to offer a $1000 scholarship in Curt's name next Fall. Tom is checking on the funding for this. I think Curt wanted to give some money to the OSU Foundation for this. Tom wanted to know if Curt had any preference on who could receive it (i.e. undergraduate or graduate or whatever). I don't think Curt cares. It is very hard to understand him.

Update on Blog Today

After writing a blog this morning, Dr. Foley called and came over to see Curt. I feel a little better now. His biggest concern was the bleeding, and there is none now. However, nobody can say what will happen. He thinks Curt's jerky movements, sleepiness, and mumblings could be from the pain medication. He does not want to change any of that over the weekend and will wait until Monday to see what how things go. He thinks Curt is getting close to a hospital bed and a caregiver. Dr. Foley didn't think I looked too exhausted, so we don't need a caregiver right away. If we do get a hospital bed, I would like a caregiver for overnight because we would probably put the bed in the family room. Later I had a nice visit with Tom Plant (who brought goodies from Glenda). Tom is going to talk to the EEC Department about a scholarship in Curt's name (Curt had talked to me about this). Curt was the first full-time (Assistant at time) Professor in the OSU Computer Science Department when it formed in 1972. The department has since merged with Electrical Engineering.
Jef and Tom are now working on our dryer vent that is venting into the garage, rather outside. It requires moving a shelving unit with lots of "junk" on it. Maddie and Vega are outside playing with some neighbor children. I guess they had a good time swimming.
So we continue one day at a time.

Last Thursday a caregiver (Barb Smith), recommended by a friend, came to assess our situation and for us to meet her. She is busy now, but might be able to help in an emergency (depending on the time). She also knows of some other caregivers when, and if, we need one. That night we all watched the OSU-Washington tournament basketball game. It went quite late. We decided we wanted some popcorn, so I was going to make some in our microwave popper. I said that Curt usually does that, and I would have to figure it out. Curt then hopped up with his walker and came into the kitchen to tell me what to do. Of course, he can't have any.
Friday morning the Hospice Chaplain came for a visit. Late in the morning, Angie took Maddie and Vega to get their hair cut. She then got Tom and Sharon, and they all ate at McDonald's. The girls could play there too. Linda came at noon. She warned me again about what could happen to Curt, but they really don't know what will happen. Mary Beth came at 4 to give Curt a shower. She noticed more of his confusion, sleepiness, and unsteadiness, and was concerned. We received more food - homemade spaghetti sauce with uncooked noodles, fresh Parmesan cheese and tulips; a chicken casserole; homemade vegetable soup with sour cream; and fresh fruit salad and cookies. Everything has been wonderful and we don't know how to thank everybody!
Jef arrived this morning about 9:30. He did a little yard work. The past couple days have been rainy, but the sun was out a little today. Curt is very tired. I really have to rouse him to get up and eat. He still uses the walker to the bathroom, but that is getting more unsteady. It is time to rouse him again to "eat".

More Family

Yesterday (Wednesday) Mike Creighton came over to be with Curt so I could walk with 4 of my friends. It felt good to walk and be outdoors. I was able to get some groceries after that. Jack Hufford arrived with my brother, Tom, and his wife, Sharon, after 1 o'clock. They were delayed at the airport in Portland because the airline had had bent the frame and broken the seat of Sharon's walker (she has Parkinson's). Linda came shortly after they arrived and later Hospice brought a walker for her to use while here. She has a problem with the seat being too high, but I think they will use it. Linda and I both notice that Curt is getting much weaker. A big concern is the blood in his mouth. It is not much now, but Linda could see the holes in the back of mouth are growing. It could possibly lead to some major bleeding. She brought sponge swabs to wet and use in his mouth. Curt had a couple other visitors during the day, and a couple people brought some supper and more "goodies".
This morning the Cravens came over to be with Curt. I didn't want Tom to take care of both Curt and Sharon. I played tennis again, but decided to get a sub for my USTA match this Sunday. Angie, Maddie and Vega and Steve Love came about 10:30. Steve was flying back to San Diego this afternoon. I heard that Curt actually sat at our dining table a little while I was gone. He has been sleeping this afternoon. It is a rainy day today. Maddie and Vega have been good, but Angie took them to the "bouncy place" to get rid of some energy. Tom went to the grocery store. I finally finished my mailing labels for the Folk Club, but I still need to work on those files later. Angie is going to make some chicken noodle soup for supper. A Caregiver is supposed to come sometime after 5 to talk to us.

I forgot to mention how many ways people have found to help us. On Sunday one of our neighbors took some of our "extra" garbage and put it in another neighbor's can. We have a small regular garbage can, recycling can, and yard debris can. Lately, we have been filling all of them.
Beth was able to fly standby on an 8:20 AM flight on Monday and got home about when the boys got home from school. One of our ministers (Courtney) came at 10 on Monday to talk with Curt and about a memorial service. Nurse Linda came at noon. His blood pressure was up a little. Curt has started to use the walker around the house now. He slept all afternoon and had a few phone calls. A nurse from our Long Term Care Insurance called to do an "evaluation" over the phone. I am trying to get caught up on some Folk Club files to make mailing labels this week. It seems like I can only work in short intervals. That evening the Reistads brought another supper for us and our mutual friend, Steve Love, who had flown up from San Diego that afternoon and will return this Thursday. We hope to see him again on Thursday morning before he leaves.
This morning the Jones' came over to be with Curt while I played tennis and showered. They left after lunch. We had a couple visitors in the afternoon and phone calls all during the day (and evening). Mary Beth came about 4:30 to help him with his shower and shaving. I told her I noticed he has been having a little bloody/yellow discharge from his mouth. She looked in his mouth and said she would report it to Hospice. Linda will be coming again tomorrow. My brother and his wife are also arriving tomorrow (their plane arrives in Portland about 10:15 AM). Kathleen has arranged for more meals for us on Wednesday, Friday and Sunday. Angie, Maddie and Vega will be coming for a long weekend on Thursday too. I had leftover steak for supper tonight and need to make a grocery run tomorrow morning after walking with some friends. The Creightons' are going to be with Curt while I do that. Late Thursday afternoon, a caregiver is going to come over to see Curt and our situation. She is already working until 5 every day. I am still not sure when I might need extra help. Hospice is impressed with our Long Term Insurance coverage.
Thank you AGAIN to everyone!

Quiet Again

It is hard to find a time to write the blog now. The Bakers left with Beth about 7 tonight, and Curt is now in bed. I'm not sure how the wedge is working in bed. This morning he had slid down with his feet hanging over the end of the bed about a foot. It was about 8 AM, and I was happy he had not gotten between 4 and 6 to throw up. However, soon after he threw up.
Yesterday, Curt had a good day. It was beautiful outside - sunny and in the mid 60's. The Bakers arrived around lunch time on Saturday. They brought a rhododendron and a few small plants. They cleaned up the yard (and our grill) a little, and Jef went to get peat moss, and propane and steaks for our grill. Jef then planted the plants and grilled the steaks. Carolyn and Terry Miller brought a nice poppy plant yesterday too. However, Jef noticed the flower gone this morning (we thought the poppy was "deer proof"). Brett and Sarah Reistad also stopped by. Curt was first outside supervising where to plant the "rhodie" (he sat on a walker). He then sat in our sunroom and on our front porch visiting. Beth, Angie, Jef and I played Mexican Train Dominoes that evening while Curt "rested" in his recliner.
Today Curt has been sleeping in his recliner and on the sofa all day. He moves around and "talks" at times. I will be glad to have Linda see him tomorrow.
Thank you again to everyone for your all you do. Curt (and I) appreciate your thoughts and prayers.

A Quiet Birthday

Wednesday night we watched a DVD of Aaron and Sam's basketball games. Beth was happy to finally reconcile our bank statements with Quicken then too.
I was able to play tennis yesterday morning. When I came home, I was concerned when I saw Linda's car in the driveway. She had just brought Curt a couple birthday balloons! Beth showed me some things on Quicken. Curt appreciated phone calls and cards from brothers, grandkids and friends (including Meryl Simpson from England) that he received for his birthday. Reistads brought over some stroganoff, salad and rolls for supper (and a beautiful hanging plant for Curt). Curt did not want to try to eat anything (like ice cream) because of the pain in his mouth. We listened to some of the OSU-WSU basketball game (we won), opened a few presents, and visited. We reminisced about the 40 years we have spent holidays, camped together, etc. Their 2 boys are about the same ages as our 2 girls.
This morning our minister, Jim Fellers, came by to visit and talk a little about a memorial service. Our associate minister, Courtney, is coming on Monday morning to talk more about this. Curt would also like to involve Steve Sprecher. We received the forms from our Long Term Care Insurance via Fed Ex today, and I filled them out and gave them to Linda to take back to Hospice. They need to fill out information too. Our cleaning lady brought a helper today. Beth just ran to the store. Curt threw up his usual one or two times early this morning, but threw up what looked like his food right before I was going to give him his second feeding. Linda arrived shortly after and said to wait 4 hours before feeding him again. I also rubbed on some more anti-nausea medicine. His left eye is getting more "matter" in it. Linda said she noticed some swelling on that side of his face (same side as the tumor). We both noticed some slight deterioration (sleeping more, etc.). They are still not sure if it will be a continual decline, or something sudden could happen. I contacted the man about the rental house in Seaside during Spring Break. He is going to advertise it again, but check with us before actually renting it if he gets an offer. Linda brought a foam wedge for Curt to use in bed. Maybe it will help to hold things down. She also brought a chair for the shower. Mary Beth (the Hospice bathing aid) called and said she could help Curt with his shower this evening, rather than this afternoon. Curt said he would like that. The Jones are bringing some Bento food to Beth and I for supper tonight.
Angie's family is coming tomorrow afternoon. Beth will return to Portland with them Sunday evening and fly back to Chicago on Monday. My brother and his wife will arrive on Wednesday. The Huffords are going to bring them here. Angie, Maddie and Vega will be here for a long weekend the next week too (the girls do not have school on Thursday and Friday). I would like to play tennis at 9:30 on Tuesday morning and go walking on Wednesday morning between 9 and 9:30. Is there anyone who would like to sit with Curt during those times? He will probably be sleeping.
Thanks again for all your support (we can't say it enough).

A Quiet House

Denny and Sandy left at 6:30 this morning for the Portland airport. It is Curt, Beth and me now. I am still not getting much done. There were several calls with Benton Hospice and our long term care insurer (Genworth), etc. Hospice does not do over night care, and some other support. Yesterday, the social worker from Hospice came and met with Beth, Angie and me. She wanted to let the girls know they are available to help them and their families too. She took our Genworth policy and contacted them. We have started the process for this care, but don't really need it right now. However, it looks like Genworth might even cover my house cleaner!
Jef's parents did visit late Sunday afternoon. Jason mowed our grass. Jef, Maddie and Vega returned to Lake Oswego after supper Sunday. Curt played Farkle (dice game) with all of us for awhile. He had a frank and emotional talk with Aaron and Sam before they went to bed that night.
Gordon Reistad took Jason, Aaron and Sam to the Portland Airport Monday morning. Denny and Sandy moved into our house then for Monday and Tuesday night. Nurse Linda came at noon to check on Curt. Monday afternoon Beth and I went to the bank and did a little shopping. Gary worked a little more on the driveway/paver stains. He and Curt walked a little outside, and Gary walked further later. Gary left for the Portland Airport about 5 PM. The rest of us ate leftovers for supper. We played a little "team" Trivial Pursuit.
Tuesday (yesterday) morning Denny and Sandy went to our Clinic for a "coumadin (sp.)" blood check for Denny. Angie did some sewing repair projects for me, and Beth keeps working on our Quicken. A Hospice aid helped Curt with a shower late in the afternoon. Denny and Sandy got our supper at McGraths.
Linda came at 2 today and commented how quiet it was. She sat down to visit awhile. She thought Curt looked good and his "vitals" were good. She said her schedule would be Monday, Wednesday and Fridays for now. Beth is out running errands.
Reistads are bringing dinner tomorrow night to celebrate Curt's birthday. I plan on playing tennis at 9:30 tomorrow morning. I think Angie, Maddie and Vega (I don't know about Jef) are coming back Saturday afternoon for the weekend. Beth will leave the first part of next week. Her family will be returning on March 20 for Spring Break. My brother, Tom, and his wife, Sharon, are making plans to fly here from Kansas from March 10-16.
So things have settled into more of a "routine" and Curt seems to be stabilized for now

More Family

I usually keep a diary for myself but haven't had time lately. I hope I can remember what has happened.
Curt actually took a shower late on Friday afternoon with the help of a Hospice person. Right after that, our supper arrived with some friends.
The past 2 mornings Curt has thrown up a little the first thing. I think he has swallowed stuff coming out of the holes in his mouth during the night (he actually swallows this all the time). I rub in a couple nausea creams and then feed him later. He ate 4 times yesterday (half portions), and so far twice today (it is after 2 PM now). Right now everyone (except Curt's older brother (Denny) and wife (Sandy)) went to the sheep barns to see the baby lambs and then are going to stop at a used book sale for our library. Curt's younger brother, Gary, arrived at our house yesterday morning about 8:30 (he flew in the night before). At noon everyone (except Gary, Curt and I) went to our friends, the Reistads, for lunch. Their older son and his family came down from Seattle to see Curt. They visited Curt in the morning. It was a beautiful day - sunny and around 60 degrees. Curt sat on the porch to watch the kids play and actually walked around our street in the afternoon. He then watched Gary, Jef and Jason try to clean off some iron stains on our driveway (they had gone to a hardward store to get a something for it). Angie and Beth took the kids to a nearby playground for a little while too. We had Woodstocks pizza for supper.
Denny and Sandy arrived in Portland around 2 o'clock on Saturday. It took them a long time to get their rental car. They were going to stop at a Walgreens in Albany (we don't have one in Corvallis) to get some medicine for Denny, but they didn't have it, so they had to drive back to Salem to get it. They finally got to our house about 7:30. They left here about 10 PM to check into their hotel. Gary is staying in Albany (the motels were busy in Corvallis) and returned this morning after 9. It was after 10 before Denny and Sandy showed up.
Curt has been sleeping alot today. Jef said his parents might come for a visit from Salem later this afternoon. I think Jef, Maddie and Vega might return to Lake Oswego tonight. Gordon Reistad is going to take Jason, Aaron and Sam to the Portland airport tomorrow morning. Gary has a "red eye" flight back to Moline, IL, on Monday night. Denny and Sandy will leave early Wednesday morning for the airport. Curt will turn 67 years old on Thursday, March 4. Angie is staying part of the week. Beth will leave at the end of the week. We have all been enjoying all the goodies that have been brought. We will all have to go on a diet soon! Thank you so much for everything!

Family Time

Angie, Maddie and Vega arrived after 6:30 last night. Jef brought Jason, Aaron and Sam after 10. Curt stayed up until they arrived.
Today has been a good day. Curt has not thrown up since yesterday morning. He has eaten twice (still with smaller portions). With all the accountants in the house (Jef, Jason and Beth), they have been working on our taxes all day. Curt answered questions, etc., in the morning. Linda came at noon and thought things were going well. She thinks they have found the right balance for nausea, etc. She brought some stronger pain patches, which are changed every 3 days. She will return on Monday, but there are nurses on call all weekend (and every night). Curt has been sleeping all afternoon and we are now waiting for the Hospice lady to come give him another "bath" right.
While most of us were working on taxes, Angie played games, etc., with the kids. They set up our ping pong table in the garage. There has been some rain on and off most of the day. The boys played a little basketball outside, and now everyone except Curt and me and Jef (who just returned from the grocery store) went for a walk. Three more people stopped by with food. We are fixing a ham tonight and some other friends are bringing side dishes.
We are looking forward to seeing Curt's brothers tomorrow.

Thursday

Curt just had one spit up (white blob) during the night. This morning he threw up 2 or 3 times. "Nurse Linda" came at noon with more medicine for nausea and instructions. We also had some medicine delivered by Fed Ex. Curt went back to bed after all his morning visitors, but got up in the early afternoon. After more nausea medicine he finally had his first feeding today at 4:30 (half his former serving). Curt had a good "sponge bath" yesterday afternoon. I also forgot to mention that Dr. Foley had talked to Dr. Chui about Curt.
My family thinks I go into too much detail, and I am afraid I will forget someone, so I will try to generalize about visitors and gifts. Three people visited this morning and 4 this afternoon, plus the Hospice Chaplain. Some other people brought food (We got some more brownies and also got a good looking coffee cake and cinnamon rolls), flowers, e-mails and cards. Someone left some goodies on our porch too. THANK YOU for all your help and support!
We are looking forward to the arrival of our grandchildren (and their parents) tonight. We just found out that Curt's younger brother (Gary) is coming from Saturday to Monday too.

Dr. Foley

Curt has done fairly well until about 5 AM this morning when he threw up. It wasn't much and was a clear fluid with a few blobs (looked like mucus). I gave him one of his medicines a couple hours later when we got up. About half hour later I started his first feeding. About half way through he spit all that up. I stopped the feeding and called Hospice. A little later "Nurse Linda" brought some nausea cream that you rub into his lower, inside arm near his wrist. You use this every 4 hours as needed. She also doubled his pain patch. She didn't stay long and is returning tomorrow. While she was here, he threw up again. The Hospice Doctor, Dr. Foley, came about 1. He talked to us and took a look at Curt. Curt also threw up when he was here. He said the tumor is probably the cause, for one reason or another. It could travel to other parts of the body or be growing into "bad" areas around his mouth or just not making him feel well. Dr. Foley also thought the substitute medicine they were using (the one we got at Rice's) was not strong enough, so he is going to change medicines. If Curt doesn't throw up for 4 hours and feels okay, I can give him another feeding of half the amount he was getting. We should continue with half these feedings as long as Curt can tolerate it. It could also be he wasn't tolerating as much as they were giving him. Dr. Foley made the comment that feeding Curt was feeding the tumor too. Sometimes your body tells you stop feeding this tumor. We will see how things progress.

One of our ministers (Courtney) came while Dr. Foley was here. If Curt is feeling okay, I might go to coffee with her in the morning. This morning Sue Creighton brought some brownies and cookies. Our neighbors, the Swansons (plus their daughter's family), came over to say goodbye before heading to Arizona for a month. Lloyd put something else on our yard for moss again today. We will miss them. A person from Hospice is coming soon to shave Curt, wash his hair, etc. I'm not sure he can have a shower yet with feeding tube.

Beth finally got out to get some groceries today. She is working on that "helping" website, and we will post it in this blog when and if it is up and running. It can be used to coordinate meals and other offers of assitance as well as anything that we might need help with. With our family in town through next Wednesday there should be lots of helpers around so we may not have any specific requests right now. Our Congregational Care group at church is providing some food for our family. Angie has been doing some work on her laptop and tried to have a conference meeting on the phone. Dr. Foley came early and interrupted that. Angie is returning to Portland tonight.

Home At Last

What a whirlwind of activity the past 2 days. Yesterday they were a little concerned about some diarhea and took a sample to check. It could be from the tube feedings, the antibiotic, an infection, or bacteria. There was the usual parade of people in his room. I was glad Angie was there to go to the OHSU pharmacy and get his liquid medicine. Hospice wanted him to have a 30 day supply. We have had a little trouble with a couple of the medicines and got some "holdovers" in Corvallis. Right now I think we are covered. Curt and I were finally able to leave about 1. The OHSU Case Worker made an appointment with Hospice at 2:15 here. We asked the Reistads to be there about then and let them in (through our garage). I made good time and was home about 2:20 or 2:25. The Hospice lady with the paper work was here along with Curt's assigned personal nurse (Linda Smith). The "head" nurse came a little later and set up everything. She made a chart of the feedings (5 a day) and medicines (several at different times). I am finding it useful. It seems like you finish one feeding (it takes about 35 or 40 minutes for the food drip into his tube) and it isn't long before the next one. There have been a lot of phone calls, e-mails, and visits from friends. Gordon Reistad picked up a single dose of one of the medicines late yesterday afternoon. Then he and Kathleen returned with supper for them and me. I will have leftovers for the girls and me tonight. My neighbor (Grace Swanson) had gotten a few groceries for me. Her husband put moss killer on our yard and was going to mow it. They will be leaving for Arizona this Thursday. I had a little trouble with one of the medicines last night and called OHSU. From now on I will call one of the Hospice nurses.

Curt only got up a couple times last night. They want me to get up with him, so I take care of my business then too. We both slept pretty well. Susan Creighton picked up some more medicine for Curt this morning. Hospice pays for all the medicine, food and supplies so I don't have to worry about any of that from now on. Curt has a low dose pain patch on, but still gets some pain, so I give him some liquid oxycodone a few times a day. He keeps his eyes closed most of the time. I had a few calls from Hospice this morning. They will arrange for respite care so I can play tennis or walk or whatever. They also told us about a website called http://www.lotsahelpinghands.com/. Maybe Beth or Angie or I will have time to set that up soon. We have been getting lots of kind messages of support and offers for help. Kathleen Reistad has arranged for some food through our Congregational Care at church while we have all this company. Someone from my bridge group (Irene) just brought a frozen lasagne. The "Ladies in the Basement" (via Farl Tubb) at our church brought a beautiful lap quilt today. The Hospice Nurse (Linda) came at noon to answer questions and monitor Curt. She will return tomorrow so she can talk to Angie and Beth too. Beth arrived late this morning from Chicago and Angie brought her here about 1:30 (I think). They have done a couple loads of wash, rearranged some things, etc. I still need to figure out where to put all the supplies, etc. Angie is going to return to Lake Oswego tomorrow evening (Wednesday) and then return with Maddie and Vega on Thursday evening after their swimming lessons. Maddie and Vega do not have school on Friday. Jason, Aaron and Sam arrive about 8:15 PM on Thursday and Jef will drive them here. Curt's brother and wife (Denny and Sandy) will arrive from Atlanta on Saturday afternoon and stay at the Hilton Garden Inn in Corvallis on Saturday and Sunday nights. Jason and the boys leave Portland about 1:40 on Monday. We're not sure yet how they will get up there yet. Denny and Sandy leave Portland on Wednesday morning. They are renting a car.
Its time to flush Curt's last feeding now. I hesitate to put names in the blog, because I might forget someone. We just want to let everyone know how much we appreciate you.

Last Full Day at OHSU

Yesterday afternoon one of the Oncology Doctors (I think a Resident stopped by) and answered some questions. Curt took the long loop on a walk with me, and I practiced tube feeding on him. Angie left at 6:30 to go on a Girl Scout outing with Maddie. I got back to their place after 9:30.

I rode up the elevator this morning (before 9) with Dr. Chui and his Resident doctor. He was carrying what looked like a donut box and Thermos cup of coffee. We talked a little bit about Curt. Dr Chui and a couple Resident Doctors came by Curt's room later (after 10) and answered some questions Angie (she came after 9) and I had. I was wondering who our doctor would be in Corvallis, and he said it would be the Hospice doctor who could consult with Dr. Chui if needed. He thinks the holes in his mouth are from the tumor which has spread quite extensively like fingers in his head. Curt received 2 more bags of blood today to perk him up for his discharge tomorrow (hopefully by 11). The Bregars visited before lunch. Jef brought the girls here after church, and we all ate in the cafeteria. We all took a walk with Curt after that to a lounge room with a better view of the city and mountains. Another beautiful day! When we got back to the room, the Clems came for a visit. Everyone (except Angie and me) left about 3:30. Angie and I have played some Honeymoon Bridge today. The nurses keep telling and showing me things about his care. The Case Worker (or Discharge Lady) also stopped by. She contacted Hospice in Corvallis and talked to the nurse on call. This nurse called me on my cell phone and will arrange for the Hospice admitting people to meet with us tomorrow afternoon. The nurse today is gathering some feeding supplies for me, and we will probably get more tomorrow. We are still working on getting his liquid medicine lined up.
Right now Beth is flying stand by here on Tuesday morning and Angie will bring her to Corvallis. Jason and the boys will come from Thursday to Sunday (they don't have their tickets yet). Denny (Curt's older brother) and Sandy will drive to Atlanta from their vacation in Florida and fly here next Saturday until Wednesday.
I am running out of battery on Angie's laptop and better publish this. We need to go eat too.

Bad News

It was too late to finish my blog last night. They finally took Curt down for surgery about 5:15. Angie and I were able to go with him to "pre-op". He had to wait in there until he went into surgery about 7:10. The doctor called me about 7:50 to say they were done and everything went well. They were able to put in the feeding tube using a scope. The doctor said to go back to Curt's room and he should be there in about 45 minutes. Well, he didn't get back until around 11 PM. They were waiting for Curt to wake up some more. Angie and I went home shortly after.
I wanted to get here early this morning (got here about 8:15). Curt got up for the bathroom and walked a "half loop" around this floor with me. Dr. Chui and a couple other doctors came in after 10. He said the MRI was hard to read, but they could see the tumor had grown. He looked in his mouth and said there was nothing else they could do. He could also tell that Curt's speech was getting worse because of the deteriation caused by the tumor on the left side of his face. We told him we wanted to return to Corvallis and he agreed. They will make arrangements for us to meet with Hospice in Corvallis on Monday. We told Dr. Chui that Beth's family was coming at the end of March, and he said Curt would be at his best right now. Right now Beth has plans to come next Tuesday. Later Curt said "the tumor won." We are listening to the OSU-Stanford basketball game and the Huffords just arrived for a visit. Another beautiful day outside. I'm not sure I will have much more to add today.

Friday - Part 1

I think this will be a long day so I am going to start a blog now. It is another beautiful, sunny day. I forgot to mention that Curt looks and feels much better. I got here after 8:30 this morning. The surgeon came in earlier to see Curt. They were supposed to operate at 1:30 and he is still waiting to go to the operating room at almost 5. He got back from his MRI last night about 10. This morning he had a little bit of a sponge bath and walked a little to "get things moving". It worked. Angie came about 11 and will stay this evening. Jef has the girls. The nurse said once he goes to surgery, he will be gone about 3 hours. Shortly after Angie arrived, a Pallative Care Nurse came. She spent a lot of time with us. She wanted to know how the cancer has progressed, etc. Then she asked what we wanted to know. Among other things, Curt said he wanted to know what the prognosis is, how it would be, etc. The PN was very caring and informative. They are still waiting for the results from the MRI. Dr. Chui is out of town today, but will be here this weekend. So I don't think we will learn the results until tomorrow. The PN said it is important that Curt feel better after getting the fluids, nourishment, blood, etc. (he does feel better). She said it is also important that it seems the cancer is still in just the head area. They are trying to figure out pain medicine dosages by how many times he uses the morphine pump (I don't think he uses it enough - he says he his pain level is always 2 or 3). They will then prescribe a long lasting pain patch or pill to use at home. She said she thinks he still has time to spend with the grandchildren and thought it would be nice if Beth came to visit while Curt is still feeling okay. If the prognosis is not good, they will refer us to hospice. She had a Resident Doctor come back later with a "pink form" called POLST. It is essentially a shortened Advanced Directive. The Sprechers (Lynda and Steve) came as she was finishing. It looks like we won't come home until Monday. Curt was awake quite a bit this morning and has been sleeping quite a bit this afternoon. I will write more later tonight.

Busy Day

I didn't get to OHSU until 9 this morning. Curt said Dr. Gross had been in earlier. He told Curt they were still considering chemo. Curt had lots of things going into him - fluids, "food" & 2 more bags of blood. They also disolve his medicine and give that through his Port. They put another IV in his arm for magnesium and something else. I think they will use that for his MRI too. Later in the afternoon they started a morphine pump for pain. The Oncology doctors want to get the pain under control. They will adjust the pump dosages as Curt uses it. A Resident Oncology Doctor Lin came in the morning and asked lots of questions and examined Curt. She came back with a colleague of Dr. Chui in the afternoon and ordered the pump. They are waiting to see what they will do next. Some Resident ENT Doctors also came in a couple times and didn't say or do much. The nurses were constantly in and out check Curt's "vitals" and the tubes. Angie was there from about 9:30 to 2:50. She had to take the girls to swimming lessons at 4. Our minister and Angie's minister also stopped by. A Speech Pathologist came and decided it was too soon to work with Curt on speaking and swallowing. Curt said it hurt a little to talk. I think that was mostly because of the feeding tube down his throat. They will stop giving him liquids at midnight tonight so that he can have surgery for a feeding "peg" in his stomach tomorrow. A "Discharge" lady came to talk about feeding Curt at home through this peg. She is going to arrange with Good Samaritin Home Health in Corvallis for someone to come to our house to teach me how to do the feeding "bags". The nurse will also check on the "peg". This will taper off eventually. The Discharge lady said that "Good Sam" doesn't come to the home after 1 PM. So when we leave here we will have to be home by then. That could delay Curt's discharge. We were hoping to leave on Saturday, but are not sure. An Occupational Therapist also came. She was impressed by Curt's strength and how handicap friendly our house is, and said she will "sign off" on him. She wants him to sit down while showering and dressing. Jef came after he got off work. We walked with Curt on a loop around the rooms in this section. The OT said he needs to get up or he might get pneumonia. He also gets up to use the bathroom. His bed has to be on an angle so that the feeding tube will keep the food going down. Jef and I got something in the cafeteria (the food is pretty good) and brought it back to the room to eat. Curt tried to get some rest. The night nurse (they do 12 hour shifts) said they would only do his "vitals" every 4 hours now. They also increased the flow of the "food". They have to see how he will tolerate it. Curt can pick his schedule for eating at home. Some people have the pump going for 12 hours over night and then have day off. I'm not sure about that. They took Curt for an x-ray about 5 o'clock so that he would be ready for his MRI (they have never done this before). They finally came to get him at 8PM for the MRI. I came home because this could take a little while. I hope to get there earlier tomorrow to what is going on.

Change of Plans

We had a call on our cell phone last night saying they could not get the medicine needed for his shot this morning so we did not need to come in. Curt was really complaining about his mouth and said there was some blood. I thought I noticed some blood on the corner of his mouth. I got a flash light and looked way in the back on the left side. I saw a hole in his mouth, some dried blood near his wisdom tooth, and a white spot. I sent an e-mail to Dr. Gross and he answered right back that he was in surgery all day today, but he would see if their Nurse Practioner could see him. They called this morning and said he could come in at 2. After Curt ate his Cream of Rice and went upstairs, he acted like his was going to collapse. I was a little nervous about that and called our friends, the Huffords. They came over within an hour and stayed until we left for OHSU. Angie met us at there. We saw the lady NP who seemed very competent. She asked some questions and looked in his mouth. She was quite concerned and had us look too. There were actually 3 holes. She thought it could be "osteoradio-necrosis" (deteriorating bone from radiation) and a tumor there. You could see some white in one of the holes, which she said was the tumor. She talked to Dr. Gross and they said Curt needed to be hospitalized right away to get fluids and nourishment. Hopefully he would get enough fluids so they can do an MRI on that tumor by his mouth. She didn't think the misery of more chemo would be worth it, but that is Curt's decision. So right now Curt is in the hospital here with lots of people coming and going doing tests, etc. The nurse was able to access his Port right away to start the fluids and take blood samples. Another nurse tried to put the feeding tube through his nose and Curt gagged and gasped for air. She quit and a Resident Doctor came later with a "snake camera" and some numbing substance to help the other nurse. It went down much easier. An x-ray person just came in to make sure the tube was going to the right place. Now they will start nourishment and maybe some other things. They gave him some pain medicine through his Port. A couple Resident Doctors came in earlier to tell us the plan. They will keep the fluids and feeding tube going through his nose until Friday. Then a surgeon will implant a feeding tube in his stomach. They need to watch where they "harvested" his stomach muscle for his operation in 2007. He will need to wait at least a day to see if that is working okay. Then he can return to Corvallis and I will learn how to use the feeding tube. We hope that will be Saturday. There was a discrepancy with his weight. At the ENT office they said he weighed about 139 lbs., but in the hospital they said he weighed about 143 lbs. (which is probably closer). The NP canceled our appointment with Dr. Chui tomorrow morning. Angie went home after 7 and I will go back soon to Angie's and return tomorrow morning. Hopefully Curt will start to feel better.

Weight Loss

When Curt went for his MRI on Friday, they could not do the contrast dye portion because his CRE was up (an indication of kidney malfunction). Because he was dehydrated, they had him get another bag of fluid. We had hoped to leave for the coast in the early or middle afternoon, but didn't leave until after 5. Jef drove our car with Curt and I rode with Angie and the girls. We took Hwy. 30 and got to Seaside about 8. We had the best unit (a penthouse on the corner of the 8th floor) with beautiful views of the beach and ocean. It was a little rainy on Angie's birthday (Saturday) and beautiful and on Sunday and Monday. The girls had a great time on the beach and swimming in the heated outdoor pool. Curt did not do well. He ate and drank very little and was in bed or resting most of the time. Most of his pain was in his tongue. I called a doctor on call at OHSU on Sunday, and she recommended Curt be checked out when we returned to Corvallis on Monday. When we went to our car at WorldMark to leave, Curt rode in a wheelchair (it was a long walk). I took him straight to our Immediate Care in Corvallis on our return around 2 PM. He weighed 143.5 lbs. (a loss of about 4 pounds over the weekend). His blood pressure was really low (106/70 lying down and 98/64 standing). The OHSU doctor implied Curt might need more hydration. The Clinic doctor also thought he needed hydration, so Curt had another bag of fluid. It was a slow drip and took over 2 hours. The Clinic doctor said this was just a temporary fix, and he should probably go to the hospital for intravenous feeding and fluid if he continues like this. Last night we sent an e-mail to Drs. Chui and Gross. I will print Dr. Gross' reply this morning.

"Sorry to hear that you have been having so much pain. It sounds like you have been quite dehydrated. I think we should seriously consider a feeding tube for you. We can discuss more but I am concerned about your trouble eating and drinking.
Unfortunately, there is no easy remedy for this [tongue pain] because it is almost certainly a referred pain. You feel it in your tongue even though the source of the pain is really at the skull base [where the tumor is]. Numbing the tongue probably wouldn't touch the pain."

We finally got ahold of a nurse with Dr. Chui this afternoon. She said he agreed with the feeding tube and would like to have the contrasting MRI. Curt is scheduled for a shot at OHSU at 8:30 AM on Wednesday. This contains an element (iron?) that is okay with kidney failure. It takes 24 hours for it to get in his system. Evidently this is an unusual situation for "parotid tumors". He will then have the MRI at 8:30 AM on Thursday and see Dr. Chui at 10:30. We are headed to Angie's later this afternoon to spend the night (8:30 AM is pretty early to drive from Corvallis).
Curt did eat his usual Cream of Rice cereal this morning and has actually drunk one Ensure so far today.

Dr. Chui (Good News)

We got to OHSU before 10 this morning. They did his blood work first. He weighed 153 lbs. and his BP was 135/85 (about normal for him). Dr. Chui (no Resident doctor today) said the ultrasound of his kidneys showed they were okay. However, his CRE and BUN were still elevated - but less than on Monday. His Red Cells were actually up a little but not quite in the "normal" range yet. They were good enough that he didn't need another transfusion. Dr. Chui asked Curt how he felt (pretty good, although he still takes Excedrin for his headaches) and decided to let him have a reduced dose of Cisplatin (it is hardest on the kidneys). Dr. Chui thinks Curt's problems with the CRE and BUN are because he does not get enough fluids. He also wants him to eat more. We mentioned Curt's doctor at the Corvallis Clinic thought Curt should take some medicine to stimulate his appetite. Dr. Chui thought it was worth a try and gave Curt a prescription. The nurse who took his blood sample did not have trouble with his Port, but 90 minutes later the fusion nurse had trouble and had to use some TPA to open it. While waiting, he got a massage of his feet, hands and shoulders from a volunteer masseuse. It was another nice day. There was fog in the morning until we got past Salem and then a ceiling of clouds the rest of the day with some sun peeking through. We had a great view of Mt. Hood from Curt's station at OHSUand didn't get out of there until almost 4. On February 12 Curt will have another MRI. We will head to the coast with the Bakers after that for the long weekend. On February 18 Curt will see Dr. Chui for the results of the MRI and possibly another treatment. Dr. Chui said to just schedule one more possible treatment after that.
I will post this now and Curt can edit it after the OSU-USC basketball game (on TV) is over. OSU won!

Dr. Chui (kidney problem)

It wasn't bad driving to and from Portland today. The sun was out and there were a few sprinkles this morning, and no moisture coming home. We got to OHSU after 10. Curt has lost about 5 lbs. (weighs 149.9 lbs.) in 3 weeks and his BP was 124/80. He saw another Resident Doctor first and Curt told her all his problems. One of the biggest concerns is the headaches he is getting. He needs to take Excedrin about every 4 or 5 hours and sometimes takes some Oxycodone. They asked how painful these were compared to before he started the chemo (they seem to be less, but Curt tries to take something when he feels the pain coming on). The other big concern is his weight loss. His sore tongue and cheek, with a lack of chewing, are major factors. He only eats liquids or very soft foods. I have used my new hand blender a few times for him. The numbness in his hands and feet are about the same. We have been having nice weather lately (not much rain and in the 50's), and he has taken several walks. His ear is bothering him again. It feels plugged and sometimes has pain. We have been putting in some drops again, and he thinks it helps. He is going to run out of that pretty soon. Dr. Chui thought Curt looked pretty good in general and his eye is not so bad now. Dr. Chui told Curt to double the antidepressant he is taking. I guess it is good to gradually work into the dose he might need. Because of the pain and Curt's weight loss, Dr. Chui wanted to do one more treatment today and then have a MRI in a couple weeks.
When Curt went in for the treatment, they had trouble again with his Port. They finally took a blood sample from his arm. One good thing is that the red cell count was okay (it was a little low). However, it showed his kidneys were not functioning right to get rid of the BUN (Blood Urea Nitrogen) and CRE (Creatinine). This can be caused by certain medications (including chemotherapy) and dehydration. Curt does need to drink more. So Dr. Chui did not want to proceed with the chemo today and wanted Curt to get an ultrasound of his kidneys after getting 2 big bags of fluids. It took a couple nurses almost 2 hours to finally draw some blood through his Port (they finally put in something to dissolve any obstructions and had to wait for that to work). Then it took at least an hour for each bag of fluid. Our friends, the Huffords, stopped by to visit for a little while. The ultrasound was afterwards in the same building. It was almost 5 o'clock before we got out of there. Dr. Chui wants to see Curt again this Thursday for another blood test, go over the ultrasound, and possibly have the chemotherapy. If this chemotherapy is not working, there is only about one other kind to try, and it has very bad side effects on your skin. So we wait to see what happens next.

Dr. Lee (for mouth)

Curt saw Dr. Lee this afternoon to see if he could do anything for his sore mouth. Dr. Lee was concerned about Curt's weight loss (he weighed almost 152 lbs. and his BP was 130/90) and his general all around weakness. He said Curt should be drinking 3 Ensures (or Boost or whatever) a day and eat liquids or soft food. He did prescribe a numbing gel to put on his tongue. If his appetite does not improve in a month (he wants to see him again then), he will give him something to stimulate his appetite.
He also said Curt should try to "exercise" (i.e., some walking) every day. Curt stumbled a little when he stood up, and Dr. Lee could feel the atrophy in his leg and hand muscles. He thinks Curt should maybe use a walker. Curt doesn't want to do that. I will walk with him. If he hasn't improved in a month, Dr. Lee will prescribe physical therapy. He said it is important to keep up his strength with the chemotherapy. Dr. Lee said OHSU has been sending him updates about Curt and mentioned the CT scan that did not show any cancer. However, I think the cancer might be in a different place in his head.
Dr. Lee also had Curt get the H1N1 vaccine. I shouldn't have gone along, because I got one too!
(I did need to go though, because Curt doesn't drive anymore.) After seeing the doctor, we went to Borders and BiMart. When Curt got home, he drank an Ensure and is now resting.

Blood Transfusion #2 & Update

On Tuesday, January 5th, Curt had his second blood transfusion for red cells. The nurse tried on and off for about 1 1/2 hours to access his Port and finally gave up and put an IV in his arm. He had 2 units of blood that took almost 2 hours each. When he began, his BP was around 106/67. They check it periodically and it was around 114/75. Toward the end, it was 85/54. The nurse had him walk around and it went back up to 116/74 (the final reading). After the transfusion, he got his "booster" shot for white cells. We went to OHSU after 9 AM and left around 2:30 PM. I went to bridge that night.
On Wednesday some Portland and Corvallis friends came over about 10 AM and helped put our Christmas boxes, suitcases, etc., up in our storage area in the garage. They also did some yard work and brought lunch. Curt got up about 11 AM, but got sleepy again about 3 PM. They left then. Curt is still able to do most things (except heavy lifting) a little at a time.
Yesterday afternoon Curt went with me shopping (got Turbo Tax and Quicken, among other things) while the cleaning lady was here (my Christmas present). Curt is still pretty tired and weak (a shower really wears him out) and sleeps a lot. He feels light headed at times. However, his nose does not run like it did. He is taking some Excedrin (not Oxycodone) for a little pain. Eating is still a problem with his sore tongue and trouble chewing and nausea. So there is a slight improvement, but we need to wait to our next visit to Dr. Chui on January 25 to see how things are going.
We are looking forward to the Bogner family coming during Spring Break. We hope to spend 3 nights with them and Bakers at Seaside on the coast. We also plan to spend President's Weekend in February at Seaside with Bakers. Angie's birthday is February 13.

Treatment #9

Another long day at OHSU. We drove up this morning for his 9:30 appointment with Dr. Chui. Curt weighed about 155 lbs. (lost about 5 pounds). As usual, he saw a Resident Doctor (they are always different) first. Dr. Chui wore a mask, because he had been sick. I was actually encouraged with what Dr. Chui had to say. He looked at the CT scan from Illinois and thought it looked good. It showed what had been done during his past surgeries around his sinuses, but didn't show any new tumors or growth. He said the discharge was to be expected from his sinuses, and he needed to watch for infection there. The odor was probably from old gunk that has been accumulating there. The lack of feeling and weakness in his feet, and somewhat in his hands, is a side effect of the Taxotere chemo. Dr. Chui decided to skip the Taxotere and just do the Cisplatin this time. He thinks the Taxotere might have been doing the best job on the cancer, but we will wait 3 weeks to see how the Cisplatin is doing. At that time they will decide on what to do for the next treatment (if any). Dr. Chui really thinks the chemo is helping. Another major problem is the pain around his left ear and jaw. Dr. Chui said that is to be expected with a "tumor eating away at the base of your skull." Curt has switched to Oxycodone for that and hopes he doesn't get too constipated. Another major problem is his tiredness and lack of energy. The nurse had a hard time opening up his Port to draw blood. We had to wait about an hour for something to dissolve and open it up. The first blood he drew was not conclusive, so he did another draw. This was a better draw. It showed his kidneys were borderline and his red cell count was way down again. So we are returning at 9 AM tomorrow for another blood transfusion. This time we came prepared to spend the night at Angie's. He can get his followup shot here after that. I thought we would be out of there sooner, but it took a long time to get the Cisplatin started, and he also had 2 big bags of saline fluid. It was after 4 before we left. I am worried that he is not eating enough. It is hard for him to chew, and because he has no feeling, he often bites his tongue. He did eat breakfast at home, but has only had an Ensure, a little soft drink, and a piece of candy so far today. We got to Bakers' after 4:30, and he immediately went to lie down (after trying to sleep in the lounge chair the whole day at OHSU). Sure hope the transfusion does better this time! Curt is also going to start to take an antidepressant. He has expressed some emotional these past few weeks. Dr. Chui said that is to be expected too.